'Bachelor' Star Gia Allemand Regrets Hiding Her Feelings for Jake
Submitted by Alexis Sezar on February 22, 2010
LOS ANGELES — Gia Allemand is still feeling regret that she didn't open up to Bachelor hunk Jake Pavelka.
"I wish I said what I thought about him," the 26-year-old model, who was voted off last week's episode, tells People. "I said it to everyone else but him. But I had a bad breakup and my heart was really broken and I was scared to come out and say it. I just kept waiting, holding off and hoping that I could get it out. I didn't."
Allemand's exit came just two weeks after Pavelka told her it was okay to fall for him, but she isn't holding any grudges.
"It was my way of trying to tell him I'm falling for him, that I love him. Every other girl was at that point already. I wanted him to see me and know I had feelings for him too," she explained. "I don't have any anger towards him. I understood the situation. I didn't expect to get this far and know him as I got know him."
As for watching the fantasy dates in St. Lucia, the New York City native admits it was difficult watching Pavelka get cozy with all three finalists.
"[It] was especially difficult because at that point you don't see the other girls," she told the mag. "I was trying to think that it's just him and I dating. So, after watching and seeing what they did, it was difficult. It hurt. It brought a little emotion to me."
Allemand also said she doesn't regret questioning Pavelka for seemingly treating all the women in a similar way.
"It was really important for me to call him out on that because I didn't understand," she said. "In my head, [I thought,] 'This is our thing.' But talking with other girls, you'd hear [he did the same things.] I think he appreciated my honesty. Honesty is what he likes best about Vienna."
While she didn't have the fairy tale ending, Allemand is still thankful for what she took away from the ABC reality show.
"The experience changed me," she confessed. "I went through it open-minded, hoping to meet a great guy and get the fairy tale, but I never in a million years imagined knowing myself better [because] of the process. You really understand yourself and what you want and don't want in the end. You know more about yourself emotionally."
So does that mean she'd be open to coming back as the Bachelorette?
"I would definitely consider it," she said. "It's such an amazing experience. I would love to ultimately find love and see how it is on the other end."
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Photo credit: Greg Zabilski / ABC